Growing Forward Personal Growth Services

I recently read a book written by a mother whose daughter was murdered at the Columbine High School.  Part of the book involved her interviewing young people her daughter’s age.  One comment from one of the young women leapt off the page.

“Sometimes I feel like my parents care more about what other people think of how I’m being, instead of really getting to know me.”

As I read the words, I noticed that I was holding my breath.  In fact, even as I write them now I hold my breath.

Could it be that we worry more about what other people think of our children?  How much time is spent wasted on things which we have absolutely no control over?  I totally get it however because ‘we know that how our children act is a direct reflection of how they’re being parented.’

I used to believe this and still do to a certain extent.  I know that the way I parent is different than how I used to parent.  I also know that some people have lots of opinions about it.  Even my husband has thoughts on how I parent our daughter.  Two different parents, two different individuals and absolutely two different ways of parenting.

I believe I create more space for her to be open with her thoughts.  Of course I don’t smile about everything that comes out of her mouth, however I don’t scold or punish her I simply ask that she becomes mindful of her choice of words.  I’d feel like a hypocrite if I scolded her when sometimes those same words slip through my lips.  I have people around me who don’t approve of how ‘lax’ I am when it comes to raising my daughter.  I get the smile, raised eyebrow and the look followed by, “It’s different when you’re an adult.”  My response?  “Really.  How so?”

I choose not to play the ‘almighty saint’ in the presence of my daughter because it simply isn’t who I am.  I’d rather show up and be who I am in every breath rather than try and remember how I’m suppose to act in different circumstances.  Remember the saying?  “Tell the truth and then you don’t have to remember what you said.” How about we shift that a little?  “Show up in your life and be who you are in every breath and then it won’t matter who you’re speaking with.”

A woman I know has a business called, “Winning through pageantry.”  As I ponder the thought of what the words mean to me, I smile.  I’m also very aware that Rhonda works differently with these young women and parents so that they don’t lose sight of who they are in the process.

Is our life any different than Pageantry?  As we grow we learn.  Needless to say what we learn is how to speak and act in different circumstances depending on who is around.  Without being conscious of what we’re doing, we calibrate and ‘act’ appropriately to whatever present.  We’ve learned well through the years how to put on a command performance however have we not noticed as adults that we’re still playing the part of an actor in our own lives instead of simply showing up as who we are?

I want to teach my daughter how to show up and be who she is in every breath and the only way that I can do that is by showing up in my own life and being authentic.  There is no doubt in my mind that as the school year approaches that she will ‘mindfully’ calibrate how to ‘be’ in each circumstance that presents with each teacher.  The difference is if she’s mindful of her choices, then she doesn’t have to lose herself in playing the role of who others want her to be.

Can we as parents get to know our children for who they are rather than point out who they aren’t?  Can we love them where they are instead of pointing out why we think they should be somewhere else?  Can we love them for who they are and simply offer guidance and let them discover life on their own?

Parenting can be rewarding and frustrating all in the same breath.  What I’ll share with you that I’ve learned from my own life is that the only time I find it frustrating are the times when ‘I think’ my daughter should have chosen differently.  She is not me in any way, shape or form.  She is her own person and that is what I’ve been teaching and modelling to her over the past few years.  She gets to choose what feels right for her the same way that I do.

Let’s get to know our children differently and for who they are.  Meet them where they are instead of telling them that where we are is so much better.  Maybe it is better (for us) however consider meeting them where they are and showing them ‘what else’ is possible so that they can choose differently the next time.

Clarity Queen

Guide to your inner truth

Yesterday I took a trip to the meadow.  It’s the future site for

“The Meadow~Learning Center for Women.”

It has been less than a year since I invested in this incredible property.  During this time, I have never been there when I didn’t have this incredible sense of awe.  I liken myself to a small child exploring for the first time.  Each and every time I marvel in the beauty and magnificence that the meadow holds.  It is a sacred space where no matter what state you may have been in, in a simple breath you become connected to your inner truth.

You are not only surrounded by peace and tranquility, you drink it in with every breath.  There is a sense of wonderment as you walk in the meadow.  What some may call weeds, I look at as the beautiful flowers that nature has provided effortlessly.  My meadow.  ‘She’ is magnificent beyond words.  Always welcoming and receiving of all who come alone or join me for a walk in the midst of her beauty.

I have witnessed the bald eagle soaring above her.  The pheasants as they call out to say hello.  The lovely chickadees for whom I have a special place in my heart.  The squirrel, robins, butterflies, dragonflies and everything that you can imagine including dear and rabbits are amongst some of the incredible creatures found in the meadow.  Different trees, wild rose bushes and what some may call weeds are all so breath taking to me.

I find a sense of calm within myself as I walk in the meadow.  I had arrived and had felt great and yet as I walked down the path and further into the meadow, something shifted.  I became even more connected to the signal that I am in the world.  It’s as though I become one with the meadow when I’m there.  It’s a beautiful experience and one which I don’t believe will be unique to me.  This is an experience meant to be shared with many.

With every breath I am filled with a deeper knowing that this will be a space for women where transformation and evolution will occur.    I think of the many women who will come to share their unique passion with others and it fills me up.  To have an opportunity to share my truth and for you to share yours and for so many others to do the same, I can only imagine what kind of vibration the meadow will have.

I am elated by the thought of possibilities and potential that is only but a few breaths away.

With a sense of admiration for all the women in my life and for all that holds meaning for me, I AM more.

Amy

I can remember the days when I used to hate flying.  I’d say up until about 3 years ago, I probably flew about 3 times in my life.  My have things changed.

The past couple of months have been busy for me and I’m absolutely loving it.  4 trips in 2 months and I AM Elated.  I’m often asked if I’m traveling for business or pleasure.  The answer is always the same and it’s always yes.  My life is my business and it’s always a pleasure.

My life is always about playing and exploring what else is possible for me in my life.  So as I venture forth into the unknown, I share my discoveries with other women.  Sometimes I hear, “wow…I could never do that.”

Well, don’t be so sure.    I am in the business of sharing with women how to create a life of your choosing.  A life that says if that’s what you want then why not create it?  It’s simple and it’s effortless.  O.K.  I said it’s simple and effortless however it’s not always easy.  The bottom line is the good, the bad and the ugly is all of our creation so really…’It’s all good.’  Life is simple when you recognize that it’s a learning experience and sometimes the experience is right there in plain view and sometimes it takes a couple of breaths before you recognize it however the learning experience is always there.  Remembering to breathe of course is of the utmost importance.

So obviously I’m not a bird however since I’m not, I do know that there are many ways to get from point A to B.  Whether it’s traveling or my life, I like to take the direct approach.  I even consider my flights and who I’ll choose to fly with.  I am not dedicated to Air Canada, Westjet, United or any other airlines for that matter, I am however committed to me and my personal evolution.  Price is another thing that doesn’t dictate what I choose, which would have been a motivational factor before along with the airlines.

If I can get a cheaper flight  and I’ll save $75 and it will take me 2 hours longer to get there, you wanna bet I’ll be investing that $75 to get me to my destination quicker.  My life and time is valuable and it’s not to be wasted…it’s to be ‘invested.’

There have been many times in my life when I didn’t think that I was worth the $75 or the new pair of shoes or whatever.  Now I know that my life is of my choosing and I am driving my own bus (or flying my own plane).  How I choose to drive and reach my destination is entirely up to me and no one can tell me any longer what is right for me.  Why?  Because they don’t really know cause they don’t live in my body.

No matter what is put in front of me I get to choose how I engage.  I am mindful in how I decide by considering my internal cues in my body.  So if I’m flying somewhere and I have the option to get there faster, it may well be that I take a more direct flight.  If however I’ve been so busy that I haven’t allowed myself to slow down, it may well be that I take a flight with stop overs just so I can have some time to myself.  It’s simple and it’s of my choosing.

So for me right now….I don’t have wings and I can tell you that it won’t be the thing that stops me from moving forward.  Air Canada has wings and for an investment…they’re willing to share them with me.  Now that’s a friend. 

As I venture forth into the unknown and loving every minute of it (well most of it), I’m happy to be your friend and to share with you what else is possible for you in your life.

Have a Wonderful Weekend!  

Amy

There’s nothing I like more than considering things from a different perspective.  Today what keeps coming into my awareness is school and the grading system.  What is it really about and is it about nothing more than….’Measuring Up’ to someone else’ perspective along with fitting in and maintaining the Status Quo?

My daughter seems to feel that if she doesn’t get a certain grade/mark, than she is less than the others who have a higher mark.  What kind of message are we sending our children and are the people educating them fully conscious in their own lives?  Ouch!  I’m not dissing all teachers because I know that there are some amazing ones out there, however I’m asking the question because I too have a school age child.

Imagine a scenario where ‘our’ children are in school all day with teachers who aren’t conscious or present to themselves?  Now imagine at the end of the day when these children come home and we’re too tire to be consciously engaging with them?  Now throw on top of all of that, the knowing that we haven’t a clue as to what is going on in our child’s lives all day.

Children growing mentally, physically and sexually and for the most part I’m going to make up the story that a lot of this growing goes on out of our awareness.  What happens next is we wonder why our children are receiving lower grades and we only look at it from one perspective.  “You’re not measuring up and you’re going to flunk the course.”  Is it really about flunking the course or getting that lower grade or is it about something else?

As I engage in conversation with young adults (13-15), I become aware of how important it is for me to stay present to myself so that when my daughter comes home at the end of the day, she has someone who is connected to themselves to engage with.

I could say that I sit in disbelief by some of the things that I hear however it is not in disbelief that I hear the words flowing from the mouth of a young person.  Their truth is real and sometimes it causes me to gasp and as much as I’d like to say that the gasp comes from disbelief, it doesn’t.

I view myself as being an open person and I can also share with you that I am naive as a parent to the goings on in a school.

I’m 44 years old and I do not remember high-school being as it is now.  However, as I reflect upon my upbringing I easily make up the story that I was totally oblivious to what what going on all around me.  In a constant state of denial is what I learned.  Close your eyes to what you’re witnessing and it won’t be happening or it will go away.  Oh yes!!!  Pretend it didn’t happen.

If pretending that things didn’t really happen worked, why are teen suicides on the rise.  As I write the words my eyes fill with tears.  I must stay present to myself so that I can truly be present to my daughter.

In an abc news release, it was clear to me that our children are capable of pretending and may well be really good at it because we’ve taught them well.  I am no different, in that my life has only changed during the past few years however, I am present now and am capable at making a difference in my life as well as my daughters.

Amongst some of the young people being interviewed one said, “I know that this sounds like a cliche, however she always walked around and seemed very happy.”

How often do we tell our children that we know what it’s like for them when we truly can’t unless we lived in their body?

If we were to consider a decrease in grades or marks as a signal that something has shifted in our children’s life, then  maybe we could sit down and ask them if they need to talk about something.  I am very clear with my daughter.  If she needs to talk about something that is going on at school or in any other aspect of her life, the deal is that I listen without judgment and DO NOT COMMENT and only offer suggestions from a different perspective if it is asked of me.’

School can stress me out and I’m not even there any longer.  Imagine what it’s like for our children?

As school draws to an end, the air becomes lighter and breathing is just a little bit easier.

Have a Great Year End at School.

Amy

There’s nothing I like more than considering things from a different perspective.  Today what keeps coming into my awareness is school and the grading system.  What is it really about and is it about nothing more than….’Measuring Up’ to someone else’ perspective along with fitting in and maintaining the Status Quo?

My daughter seems to feel that if she doesn’t get a certain grade/mark, than she is less than the others who have a higher mark.  What kind of message are we sending our children and are the people educating them fully conscious in their own lives?  Ouch!  I’m not dissing all teachers because I know that there are some amazing ones out there, however I’m asking the question because I too have a school age child.

Imagine a scenario where ‘our’ children are in school all day with teachers who aren’t conscious or present to themselves?  Now imagine at the end of the day when these children come home and we’re too tire to be consciously engaging with them?  Now throw on top of all of that, the knowing that we haven’t a clue as to what is going on in our child’s lives all day.

Children growing mentally, physically and sexually and for the most part I’m going to make up the story that a lot of this growing goes on out of our awareness.  What happens next is we wonder why our children are receiving lower grades and we only look at it from one perspective.  “You’re not measuring up and you’re going to flunk the course.”  Is it really about flunking the course or getting that lower grade or is it about something else?

As I engage in conversation with young adults (13-15), I become aware of how important it is for me to stay present to myself so that when my daughter comes home at the end of the day, she has someone who is connected to themselves to engage with.

I could say that I sit in disbelief by some of the things that I hear however it is not in disbelief that I hear the words flowing from the mouth of a young person.  Their truth is real and sometimes it causes me to gasp and as much as I’d like to say that the gasp comes from disbelief, it doesn’t.

I view myself as being an open person and I can also share with you that I am naive as a parent to the goings on in a school.

I’m 44 years old and I do not remember high-school being as it is now.  However, as I reflect upon my upbringing I easily make up the story that I was totally oblivious to what what going on all around me.  In a constant state of denial is what I learned.  Close your eyes to what you’re witnessing and it won’t be happening or it will go away.  Oh yes!!!  Pretend it didn’t happen.

If pretending that things didn’t really happen worked, why are teen suicides on the rise.  As I write the words my eyes fill with tears.  I must stay present to myself so that I can truly be present to my daughter.

In an abc news release, it was clear to me that our children are capable of pretending and may well be really good at it because we’ve taught them well.  I am no different, in that my life has only changed during the past few years however, I am present now and am capable at making a difference in my life as well as my daughters.

Amongst some of the young people being interviewed one said, “I know that this sounds like a cliche, however she always walked around and seemed very happy.”

How often do we tell our children that we know what it’s like for them when we truly can’t unless we lived in their body?

If we were to consider a decrease in grades or marks as a signal that something has shifted in our children’s life, then  maybe we could sit down and ask them if they need to talk about something.  I am very clear with my daughter.  If she needs to talk about something that is going on at school or in any other aspect of her life, the deal is that I listen without judgment and DO NOT COMMENT and only offer suggestions from a different perspective if it is asked of me.’

School can stress me out and I’m not even there any longer.  Imagine what it’s like for our children?

As school draws to an end, the air becomes lighter and breathing is just a little bit easier.

Have a Great Year End at School.

Amy

There’s no doubt in my mind how easy it is to disconnect in a moment and not be fully present to our children.  After-all, we do it to ourselves quite often and without realizing being aware of it.

Being a parent is a huge responsibility and not one to be taken lightly.  How often do we jump to our children’s defence when they’re little and would go ‘into battle for them’ if that is what’s required?  “I’d cut off my own arm for my child.”  Wow, quite a noble gesture however in the ‘act’ of doing so, ‘Are you staying present to your child?”

Believe it or not, sometimes I’d say cutting off our arm would be an easy solution seeing that we wouldn’t have to ‘deal’ with the real issue.  I know, I know, it’s a little harsh however I’m speaking based on my own personal experiences and that of individuals that I’ve worked with.  Parenting is quite simple however, it isn’t always easy.

As we go into battle and be the voice for our children, I have but one question: Are you going into battle for your child to give him or her voice, or are you going into battle to fight for an old cause which is one that wasn’t dealt with for you as a child?”

I’d say that there’s one thing that the majority (if not all of us), find to be a challenge that we face not only as parents but as individuals who are constantly moving forward.

“Do we allow ourselves to be done with our past so that it doesn’t become our children’s future?”

I remember early on in my marriage being quite clear that if we were to have children that I would not tell the story of the ‘hurtful and mean’ things that people did to me as a child.  I would not be responsible for being the one to plant the seeds of dislike towards others for my child by telling them of something which I experienced when I was younger.  My intention was and still is to allow for our daughter to learn based on ‘her’ own experiences with individuals rather than from mine.  My experiences are unique to me as are hers for herself.

Our experiences allow for us to make choices in the next breath which will have an outcome.  What I know is that if I tell her the ‘story’ of one of my experiences, she may make a decision for herself based on my experience rather than her own.  Our children love and trust us and they also believe what we say, so best be take a breath and allow for them to grow and expand their lives based on the choices that they make.

There are times when I as the lioness, feel the urge to go into battle for my child.  What I also know is that in the next breath, I discover that I’d go into battle under false pretense, without being fully present or truthful to myself and therefore not being authentic in truly taking action on behalf of my child.

Can we as parents allow ourselves to not only be done with our past but to also remember that our past and our experiences are ours, not our children?  Do we create the safe space for them to create new experiences?  Or, do we impede on their personal growth by offering old stories of what was our experience, enabling the past to be projected in the future?  If our past wasn’t that great, why pray-tell would we share it with our children so they can recreate and repeat history all over again?

For more information about Amy or programs and services that she offers, please feel free to contact her at 902-832-9332 or amy@thepowerlieswithin.com

thepowerlieswithin.com

As the weather changes, have you noticed that you feel different too? I understand the first things that comes to mind when I say that is, the weather is a lot warmer.  There’s more sunshine etc.

In this case I’m speaking about the needs of our body and what is calling to us.  Personally I allow my body to lead me in probably 98% of my life these days.   So what is my body telling me?  It wants the cells of my body to be nourished differently.

I’m not a health fanatic by any means even though I’m a registered nutritionist.  However what my body is calling for these days is more movement, water, more quiet and relaxing time.  These days if I put junk food into my mouth, my body revolts and why shouldn’t it?

For the past couple of weeks I’ve been getting up early and listening to a relaxing meditation before I even start my day.  Me who has never enjoyed sitting still for too long is listening to a meditation? Yes ladies, I kid you not.

I come down in the morning, plug in the kettle (and not for tea or coffee in fact I’ve had maybe 2-3 cups of coffee during the past couple of weeks and my body doesn’t even want it).  In stead I pour some organic lemon juice in my cup and then add my water and then sit and relax.

I Start my day off with 15 minutes that is just for me and no one else.  It seems to be exactly what my body is wanting these days.   Once I’ve relaxed for 15 minutes or so, then I drink my warm lemon water.

Warm lemon water in the morning is so beneficial because we need to rehydrate from our night of sleep.  What better way to do that, than with organic lemon and warm water. Why warm water instead of cold?  Warm water ( or room temperature) is easier on our body. The first thing our body does when takes in cold water is to work to heat it up.  Warm water and lemon is a perfect way to start your day along with a little relaxation time.

I know what some of you are thinking.  Why do I need to relax when I just woke up.  Well, why do you need to get up and start rushing?

Consider this.  You get up in the morning and instead of engaging the habituated way of rushing when the alarm goes off, you lay in bed for a few minutes and contemplate what your day may look like.  Oh yes, I hear your next thoughts. “I do the same thing everyday so it’s a no brainer, there’s really nothing for me to consider.” Well what if, and this is only a suggestion, you actually take a couple of minutes to consider what your day will actually look like.   The next thing I’m going to ask you is this, “When was the last time that you even considered your day or thought about how it may look?”  Hmmm, thought so! 

The sun comes up earlier, it’s warmer out and there’s something different inside and out.  You feel different and yet you simply believe that it’s because the warmer weather is here.  What if that’s only part of it?  What if along with the change in the weather your body is coming out of its own sense of slumber?  Have you ever considered that your body is waking up to something new?

Have a wonderful day and evening and be gentle with yourself and take time to smell the many wonderful smells there are in the air now that spring is here.

Amy

Yesterday I found myself perusing through the isles at the book store. I wasn’t looking for anything in particular and was simply allowing my body to lead. To me, allowing my body to lead is ‘healthy.’

I engaged in whatever came into my awareness when I was walking and allowed my eyes to take in what was there. Something caught my eye and I walked over with a sense of curiosity and yet I realize now that it was as though I was confirming for myself that I see the world through different lenses.

The subject that caught my eye was, ‘Healthy Life Style.’

My eyes glanced over the many books that were there. I allowed myself to pick up the books and see if the inside reflected what was on the outside. Unfortunately, Yes!

I’m 44, happier than I’ve ever been in my entire life. I wake up in the morning simply happy to ‘be.’ I don’t plan for my day I simply allow for it to unfold moment to moment and breath to breath. I have what I’d call a Healthy Life Style.  My healthy life style goes far beyond the food that I put in my mouth, the shape of my body, how much I weigh and how my hair is done or whether I choose to wear make-up.

According to the many books that were there, “I do not have a healthy life style.”

Was I surprised by my findings? Not in the least bit. You see I believe that there are different perspectives of what a Healthy Life Style is. One is viewed as external referencing and mine…is from the inside where the signal that I am moves my physical being to engage. There is a deeper understanding and sense of who I am and what I am. And I am clear…I Am not what you see with your eyes. I am a quantum biological being. And yet our society tells us that what we see with our eyes is truth. My knowing, is my truth and my eyes, well sometimes they tell me something very different which doesn’t always align with the inside sensory cues in my body.

Do I always eat tofu and spinach? Nope and I do enjoy them quite often. Do I get up and exercise or jog every morning? Absolutely not and I enjoy exercising and walking quite often. Do I get up and make sure that my hair is perfect and make up is ‘just so’ before I leave the house?  No. And yet according to most of the books that I looked at, those are some of the requirements to have a Healthy Life Style.

Beyond technique, strategies and rules that tell me how to live my life and tell me what ‘qualifies’ as to whether or not I have a ‘Healthy Life Style,’ I’ll stand present to myself and know from the inside out that I have an absolutely wonderful life style.

Despite that I don’t have ‘perfect’ skin, that I do have cellulite, that I have gray hair and that my body doesn’t look like a ‘Barbies,’ I am a living breathing expression of what is possible in life.  Although my skin isn’t perfect, I glow with excitement and happiness for the knowing that I have in my body.  Although my body isn’t slim or trim and doesn’t have the physical appearance of what Healthy ’should’ look like, the excitement and passion that I exude, emanates from the core of my being and is felt by many.

I am a Registered Nutritionist who learned well that you are what you eat.  What I hadn’t learned, was that you are what you think.  I am not what others think of me, I am what ‘I’ think and beyond that…I AM what I Know.

With every breath I take, I grow and my life expands.  The physical appearance is a reflection of whatever it is that you need to see and has nothing to do with what I know as my truth.

Having a Healthy Life Style is whatever you believe it to be.  I believe in a world of Endless Possibilities.  Beyond what I eat or do with my body, I know that for me viewing the world/my life as an opportunity to grow and expand is indeed, “A Healthy Life Style.”

Aloha & hugs,

Amy

I have a different understanding of what seems to make our lives so complicated.  If we stop and plan for all kinds of things that haven’t even happened yet, we can possibly drive ourselves insane.

There are those who would beg to differ with me when they see and watch me create things that are going to unfold in the future and yet what I know is,  I have but this moment and this breath to engage only that which presents for me.  So if it’s information about something that is unfolding in the future, I engage in it and only in that moment and only in that breath.  I choose not to sit down with a  pen and paper and continue focusing on the last breath (because that breath is over).  Of course in the next breath if what is presenting is ‘future’ stuff again then I’ll engage it and not unless it comes up again.

When I say the ‘Plan is there is no plan,’ I don’t just say it, I live it.  I only engage in the moment that presents so my life truly isn’t difficult.

What is it that I’m noticing in this breath?  Wait a sec…it’s already over.  So what’s the use of getting wrapped up in it when it has already passed?  Now in the next breath, in the next moment, what am I becoming aware of?  What choice do I need to make ‘in this breath?’

When I say that I live my life moment to moment and breath to breath, I realized this weekend that others didn’t having an understanding of what I was sharing.  Is it important for me we have others understand me?  Absolutely not.  And yet, in that moment and in that breath that I was sharing information, it was indeed important.  Again…I engaged what was present for me.  Normally I don’t care if others agree, understand, support or whatever because truly form me, in a breath it won’t matter anyway.  However in the breath that I took, I found something held meaning for me that usually doesn’t and so…I engaged what presented in the moment.

As I expanded on what I said, I saw eyes open wider, heard breath deepening, I witnessed deeper connection to self.  It was magic.  What I’d like to share with you is that living in the moment, is magic.

In this moment and in this breath, what is it that I’m choosing to engage in?

Life can be insanely complicated when we’re planning for things weeks and sometimes months away.  Can you trust the knowing in your body and know that if something holds that much meaning for you that it will present again in another breath?  And when it presents, engage.  If it doesn’t, engage only what presents.

Why make up stories about what was or what will be?  It’s useless  really.  The past is over,  so is that breath.  The future hasn’t unfolded,  so you haven’t taken that breath yet.

Living in the moment and I mean truly living in the moment is a very different way to live.  Being creatures of habit we put so much wasted energy on what was and what will be that we lose track of the magnificence that the ‘moment’ has.

Live in the now and don’t worry about what was or what will be, Notice what is and engage from there. 

We can only truly live in this moment.  Not the one that was or the one that will happen, only in this one.

So in every breath I take and in that moment, I only choose to engage that which presents and maybe I’ll choose not to engage what presents….and that too is my choice and a whole different blog. 

Living in the Moment and Loving it,

Amy

Last weekend I engaged in what was a life altering experience. Eight women showed up standing tall and true in who they are. In my experience, we were all Honest, Open, Clear and Direct.

As I reflect and look around the table, I see women with lots of fire energy ready and willing to claim more of their lives. The intention for the weekend was clearly about Discovering the More that We Are. Both days were amazing and yet Sunday came with teeth and edge for all. There were times of tears and there was much laughter and sometimes I simply didn’t get what was so funny. However, they did so it was perfect.

The morning started off with lots of fire. I often share with people that it isn’t always easy being me. I take up lots of space, I speak what it is there for me and if I have lots to say….you’re gonna hear it. I am clear, I am unwilling to be less than who I am. I did it for years and it didn’t work well for me then and I’ll not do it now.

I became a huge trigger for a very dear friend of mine. As she spoke her truth my heart swelled with absolute pride for both of us. As I write, my eyes fill with water. What was moving through her, was hers and yet I was the trigger. (Sometimes it’s not always easy being the trigger.) As we both stood present to ourselves and each other, magic happened.

In my 44 years of life, never have I experienced something so powerful with someone who I hold so dear to my heart. I love Naomi from the core of my being. I knew what was moving through her was all hers and I was the gift. And in a breath, she became my gift.

All my life I would feel bad when I thought that I was the cause of someone else’ discomfort and would feel responsible for what they were experiencing. In this case I knew that I wasn’t ‘making’ her feel bad rather me being a trigger for her, she got to see aspects of herSelf which she had yet to claim. Here she was, being so open and honest knowing that as I stood present to myself, there was nothing that she could say that would offend me.

For part of my life, I took almost everything that everyone said personally and all it did was got me further away from my own truth. It was huge for me not to pull in on myself and somehow not take something that wasn’t personal, as personal. I was able to hear her words without making it about me. How many times in my life did I allow myself to feel less than someone else, smaller than someone else all because I heard their words as judgment and believing they were right and I was wrong. In my new view of the world, there is no right and wrong. There is only discoveries and experience that allow us to claim more of who we are.

The beauty of what transpired between two friends was raw honesty with lots of space for each to claim their truth. Her truth was in her spoken words and mine was in the willingness to create space for myself and listen knowing that although I was the trigger, there was nothing for me to claim in her agitation. What was mine to claim was knowing that I didn’t have to lose myself or feel bad even if I was the trigger for her.

How many times in our lives do we pull in on ourselves by getting caught up in someone else’ words. The only time I can feel that I’m less than another is when I curl in on myself and not allow myself to know my own truth.

She became a huge gift to me because she is a dear and close friend of mine. I now can thank her for the gift of knowing that I can stand present to myself and not even get lost in the words of someone who I RIG. My family, friends and all aspects of my life just got a whole lot simpler for me because I know that I no longer have to surrender mySelf, not even to someone who means so much to me.

When I’m engaging with others, I do not ‘waver’ in who I am and what I can say honestly is that in the presence of family and very close friends it could be a bit of a challenge. Now that has been dissolved, I become more and so does everyone around me.

Can you imagine a world where there’s room for all of us to speak our truth, to hear someone else’ truth and never for a second perceive it as criticism, taking it personally or feeling the need to look at it as they’re right and I’m wrong or the reverse.

When we’re connected to who we are and we Remember who we are in every breath, life isn’t only simple, it’s easy.

I stand in such a very different place because each of the women in that room were willing to speak their truth and knew…that I am their gift and they are mine. I don’t think up until last weekend that I knew how much of a trigger (gift) that I am to people in my life. And now I know that I’m also willing to see more of the gifts (triggers) that are in my life.

Wow! Imagine considering that the very person who ’causes’ you agitation as being a huge gift? Yes indeed, I have a Different View of the World.

Mahalo to all the magnificent women who were there and all of you who are part of my life. I have a deeper sense of Respect for all of you, in this breath.

Amy