There is a difference
Yesterday I found myself reflecting on who I was and how people you to see me. There was great comfort in the way that I ‘used’ to be because people knew what to expect. It was comfortable for them and It Was Not Comfortable for Me.
Today, in the way that I choose to live my life is quite different for me (and for others) than what it used to be.
I used to worry so much about how family and friends viewed me. I’d be concerned about what they thought of me, if they were talking about me. And I can even say up until a couple of days ago I cared ’somewhat,’ what they thought of my writing or what I was doing. Yesterday in a breath, I really discovered that no, it isn’t always easy because I would love family and friends to be happy for me and what I realized is, I care more about what I think of myself and….there opinion is none of my business.
So the awareness yesterday was that most of my life I’ve felt as though I’ve stood alone. I’m not saying that other people weren’t in my life, I’m saying that I ‘chose’ to stand alone. What I did discover is that there’s a huge difference in standing alone and standing your ground.
Standing alone for me was about me choosing to curl in on myself and worry about what other people (friends, family, co-workers) thought of me. Standing my ground is about me standing tall in who I am and not apologizing or feeling the need to explain my choices. This is a very different place and a very powerful place to stand and…it’s mine. It’s mine in the sense that I’m allowing myself to show up in my own life and not worry whether or not you’re showing up in yours and what you think of me.
In a conversation yesterday, I shared my thoughts with someone.
There’s a point in your life where you can easily hide from others. Then there’s another point where you can still hide from others but it becomes difficult to hide from yourself. And then…there’s a point when you’re simply no longer able to hide from yourself and you’re not willing to hide from anyone else. That is a point of transformation. How do I know that? Because yesterday I inhaled possibilities and I exhaled my potential. I became more because I’m no longer willing to be less…even if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
If I look to the outside of myself and allow other people’s opinions to ‘infiltrate’ my being, then all of the hopes and asprirations that I have will disappear and so will I. Health issues will arise and I will disappear. And ya know what? I’m not willing to do that anymore no matter what others think of me.
Go get your own dream and make it a reality and then come back and we’ll have a great conversation about ‘what’s possible’ in our lives. I’m not interested in small conversations or even living small. This is my life and you can’t have it. And since it is my life, I’m living it large whether or not it makes you uncomfortable. Living small is what makes me feel uncomfortable and I’m done doing what makes me feel dis-comfort in my body.
In hale possibilities. Exhale potential. Live life large and don’t apologize for it, just have fun with it. Eventually others will wonder what you’ve got going for you. Imagine when you share with them that it’s as easy as consciously breathing in and out and…Conscously Choosing what’s meaningful.
Transformation and Evolution is a state of being.
Amy
